This Week In Automatic Transcription Fails - Week 4

Happy Friday, folks! And welcome to another edition of "This Week in Automatic Transcription Fails".

It's been another 7 days with a lot going on, but we're back again to close out your week with a quick break and something fun. Get ready to be auto-transcribed into the weekend! Although, with the way these transcriptions are coming out, you're likely to get accidentally transcribed right into Monday.

Until then, grab a seat and enough snacks for the next two minutes, and get ready for a chuckle or two.

Coach, or couch? You decide!

This tweet certainly was a breath of fresh air.

It seems that every week we come across another instance of auto-transcriptions dropping the ball on someone's name. Although, if at least one of these attempts was correct, maybe the book is about a dance coach and a swimming coach falling in love? I'm not going to lie, that sounds like the delightful romantic comedy we all need right now.

Technology, am I right?

To be fair, this is exactly how I want to start every zoom call - by immediately leaving it in an incredibly dramatic way that I can't take back.

This Twitter user is really putting the throw in Anthropologist! If this transcription were correct, that would be one heck of a meeting. If I ask for an invite, do I also get to toss my laptop somewhere? Because honestly, it's been a bit troublesome lately and I could use a break. Either way, I think to score an invite you need to be an accomplished throw laptopogist (anthrolactologist).

...Fed them to whom...?

This transcription fail either implies that the speaker was an accomplished chef or... well, still an accomplished chef, but one who uses some questionable ingredients.

Whether you're the person in charge or feeding the entire US Army in the time it takes to consume lunch, or serving some sort of Soylent Green style meal, I really hope this transcription fail is meant to mean something completely different that what it says. I mean, the first option alone would require such an intense amount of physical labour, and the second one... let's just say that's slightly more horrifying to think about. Slightly.

Queer Eye for Your Ten Friends

Tan France is delightful enough for ten people, so this kind of makes sense.

I honestly can't remember the last time I was able to take pleasure in talking to a total of ten friends, so perhaps this is just wishful thinking? Maybe even our devices are getting lonely in the wake of our 12th week in quarantine. But whether you're interviewing Tan France or jumping off a Zoom call with some pals this weekend, here's hoping everyone is having a good time.

Thanks for reading!

Check in again next Friday for your weekly dose of automatic transcription fails, where we learn once again that the machines are just like us! And what I mean by that is that they are far from perfect.

Want to be featured on next week's edition of "This Week in Automatic Transcription Fails"? If you have a funny mis-transcribed tidbit, feel free to tweet using the hashtag #transcriptionfails to submit your own transcription fail!